Your love is all a lie -
For all you know, I have given up already.
I have washed my hands off you.
I have left you for good.

I'm seriously very tired.
The jealousy is wearing us both out.
It's arduous.

You know, I seriously think that we are both not at the right age to go about Love.
We are not in the right state of mind and mentality.
Perhaps, when we are older,
when our minds mature and we can go about things, will be the ripe time to get into a relationship.
For now, We have much more things to focus on and to achieve.

It's not that I don't love you.
A relationship can only be maintained when there's mutual respect, understanding, love and trust.
You say that I don't trust you.
Why, I would say the same about you.
If you trusted me, You wouldn't say those hurtful stuff.
Knowing how much I abhor flirts, you associate me being one.
Do you know how fucking that is?

I long knew we lacked understanding and trust.
I told you about it.
and everytime, 
your plan to salvage is : " Give us some time to chill " .
But hello?   no avail! 
Shouldn't we work on something better?
no, we cant.

You get close with some girl and you expect me to treat it as I didn't see anything?
You expect me not to feel jealous?
No way, I can't do that.
However, I can do one thing -- Heck care. 
Yes, I will.
But you know what?
I really wanna know why you aren't self-conscious.
oh wait.
You are.
But you don't give a bloody damn to my feelings.

You came to me and said : "  are you jealous? "
hah -
Since you could ask me that question,
I suppose you knew how I felt.
and instead, you carried on.
what the hell .
That's seriously double the hurt.

I don't wanna restrict your friends,
I don't wanna restrict how you treat them.
Because different people have different ways of expressing how they feel towards that person.
and to add on, 
different people live on difference principles and values.
Just like how I can't accept the fact of you getting close to someone I detest quite the least, I should say?

Getting back to the topic of you associating me with being a flirt, 
no matter how close you and "her" get, 
I never once said that you flirt.
As for you?  you said it.
Do you really want things to come to an end?
You are bringing everything down!
However,
I must admit.
I am partly the problem too.
You are not at fault, okay. ( ... )
It lies with me, okay?

I just cant figure why,
after going through so much,
you still do things without thinking of the consequences.
Everything cannot be solved just by saying a simple " sorry " , you know.
Sorry is just a word.
It cannot be compared to the emotions stirred by your actions.

I try thinking about what I want.
You once told me that all you wanted was attention from me.
I gave you, didn't I?
But did you give me?
I safely say : " no " . 
To each his own.
Also, you keep saying that Friends are more important than you.
But you know what, the feeling is neutral and mutual! 
I don't wanna harp on this.

since you feel tired,
won't you just consider a better way to perhaps end all these hurt?
It's straining, and for all you know,
the year is coming to an end, 
just like how everyone will be separated ultimately.
I seriously hope even if we end this,
there will be a happy ending that will remain etched in my memory forever.

To me, this is no good start.
The first relationship I had, coming to such an end, -.-"
( sorry, cannot help ranting ).

Even so, I think that you will meet your Miss Right one day.
I'm just not the one for you, yes?
Take care of yourself,
Letting go in the initial stage will be painful,
but bear with it.
We will get over it ( Although this sounds superficial, it's true ) .
There's no such thing as True Love at a age of 12. 
Okay, there is. But rarely.
All the best to you towards realising your dreams and ambitions.


( I love you ,  I really do .  But there comes a time when we have to let go .  Everything shall be decided souly on your decision.  We shall move on from there, sweetheart.  Once again, I love you,  I really do .  )